In our class we have been writing stories about a video but changing a part it. We have been changing the animal in the story. This is my paragraph.
Bored but hopeful to find something, I glanced around the lonely blue sky. All of a sudden a burst of bright colours surrounded me. WOOSH huge birds spiraled up to the sky leaving me bewildered. They were like professional circus performers. Gentle, soothing, mesmerizing tunes floated through the air, quite opposite to the cacophony of birds. The divine animals started hovering alongside my steady floating boat. Dumbfounded I waddled over to the edge of the boat and the creatures spread their soft feathery wings. Their wings were large, elegant and every line of feathers were a different colour. It’s eyes were enormous and dark. Soft noises started to come out of their sharp, slender beaks like they were talking to me. On one of the animals comfortable looking backs was a hatchling. It’s eyes were as big and as dark as it’s mothers. The hatchlings skin was bare, on some parts of it, little feathers the colours green, red, yellow, blue, purple, and orange were growing. I excitedly flipped through the pages of identifying extraordinary animals but the picture of these colourful creatures weren’t there. Thrill flooded through my body I was so happy, I was jumping up and down, I couldn’t believe I had discovered a new animal.
I like how you used lots of descriptive language, next time you could use some more personification and metaphors,
Have you ever wished that you had magical sweets that could do harmlessly funny damage. Well I have. So you probably know by now that my speech topic is why we should have magical sweets. Listen to me and you will also have a strong desire to have these amazing, mouthwatering magical sweets.
Donuts, Mints, tic tacs, nerds and chocolates. We muggles have all these sweets but do we have sweets that hop out of their packaging, here are some different types of Magical sweets. Chocolate frogs which are actually live, there exploding bonbons, acid pops, bat’s blood soup, blood flavoured lollipops, fever fudge, black ink gumballs, hiccuping sweets. Fainting fancies are another one then there is puking pastilles and thousands more. These are only the gentle ones. Wait what who said that. My favourite sweet has probably got to be nosebleed nougats. This one time I gave it to my sister she was carrying a tissue around on her nose for 2 days.
Yes I told you what type of magical sweets there are but I haven't told you when to use it. The best time to pull this sweet trick out your sleeve is when you’ve done something wrong and you have to apologise. Just say sorry, trick em, leave em, then you can have the joy that you apologised but it really didn’t mean anything.
You can you use magical sweets on absolutely anyone. If you just want to trick someone for fun, then you should use something like a chocolate frog or bertie botts EVERY flavoured beans. You can use acid pops, exploding bon bons, bat’s blood soup or fainting fancies, if a person is being mean to you. But if a person is really getting on your nerves and your at a point that you want to kill them, puking pastilles is the way to go.
Can you think of how these sweets can really benefit someone? I’m thinking doctors. A doctor can simply feed a crying child a stingless lollipop to successfully take the injection without being deafened by their screams. or Parents? - Calming cauldrons can be of big help if a child is going beserk. It will calm the child and get it to slip into zen mode thus saving the parents energy. Last of all teachers can control their students by a little help from tongue tarts. The students tongue’s will get so heavy that they wouldn’t even bother to talk so they would just get on with their work! Now that’s very helpful, do you agree?
So now that you understand why magical sweets are so cool, harmlessly funny, plus they’re very beneficial, next time you go to pick up a piece of candy, I want you to take a second and think, why can’t candy be magical in this world, after all it does exist in the wizarding universe.